I had probably lost 100lbs. I could barely hold food down. I was convinced I was hypoglycemic. I had pain beyond anything I could imagine. I had allready had major, major dental surgery. I was dizzy, numb in spots, and on my way to a major breakdown.
My ability to walk was comprimised. My thought processes were off-kilter. My mood was bad, my tongue was worse. I had the best intentions at heart, but the worst way of implementing them.
I was still over a month away from any kind of healing. I was degrading fast.
T minus 22 days and counting to personal armageddon.
But I was still going to work, for whatever misguided reason. I did not belive there was anything truly wrong with me, and I had a job which somehow afforded me the freedom to take a moment to recover from whatever it was that was affecting me.
I was sitting for hours on end, staring at the screen for no apparent reason. My fingerprints were becoming embedded in the back of my neck. I was ignoring peoples advice on going to a doctor, as I did not have any insurance.
I was a dumbass.
Yes, this is all going to be very self-centered, yes its going to sound strange. But when your talking about a brain tumor, nothing sounds quite right. Central Neurocytoma, blocking the CSF flow. Hydrocephalus.
None of it ever sounds quite right.
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