7/5/07

To wit's end and beyond!

After reading an op/ed piece by Mac Obenshain in today's Times (read it here), I am curious as to when Valley Forward will sponsor "Gallop 4 Literacy."

This letter takes spin far beyond the "O’Reilly Factor," far beyond the Hillary Clinton campaign.

This letter goes so far as to twist the words of the Oxford  some Dictionary, J.B. Fishburn, and the commonly understood meanings behind words... and not just words.

Words strung together into a phrase! Which, for the benefit of the woefully under-educated, he dissects into it's raw parts - and explains in brutal detail what you fail to comprehend!

Lucky us!

J.B.F. said that Mill Mountain should be"... developed and forever preserved, improved and maintained for the use and pleasure of the people of the City of Roanoke, Virginia, and vicinity as a public park."

Now "developed," his dictionary states, means "to bring a more advanced, effective, or usable state" AND "to cause to grow and expand." But.. but... that's just one definition of it, among at least 7 main, and upwards of 20 sub- definitions all dependent upon it's context.

Oh wait - context. Hmm... context. What possible context could J.B.F. have had in mind when writing these words?

Well, not being as apparently historically accurate as this individual (who, by the way, still thinks Rockledge is up on Mill Mountain - and crumbling as we speak. "The former Rockledge Inn should not be discarded to the side like some broken-down old thing.") I happen to know that at some point in his life, J.B.F. either witnessed or heard about the debacle of Woodland Park - or possibly the abandonment of Mountain Park & Casino.

Not wanting this gift to befall the same fate - he wisely included a blurb about the expected use and future of Mill Mountain.

I forgive the absolute ignorance in regards to the Hotel Roanoke, the H&C and Dr. Pepper signs, and the Star. I am guessing he is on the young side of "twenty-something" and does not know about the lights, stars, and hotel's checkered past. Well, all except the Star - which was a commercial venture graciously maintained by the Chamber of Commerce for many a year.

But this individual, with his twisted dictionary, does not receive pleasure from Mill Mountain. So let's all change it so he does.

That is basically the entirety of his argument, minus the spin.

So all you people who enjoy the mountain, the zoo, the activities at the Welcome Center (yes, the building which rests on the site of the former Rockledge) - tough kitties! He knows more than you do! He can selectively use a dictionary! Possibly multiple!

And am I mistaken or did he attempt to invoke the "Scooby-Doo" rule by stating we will continue to "defy Fishburn's request instead of granting it." Does this mean the ghost of J.B.F. will begin appearing atop the Star, until the Valley Forward Mystery Machine comes to investigate - and build an Inn to quell the evilness?


Ahh... perhaps Valley Forward needs a Propaganda Minister to better control the message and it's disbursement.

Oh - and as a point of clarification: The definition of "forever preserved."

1,001 - thanks Mac!



1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Oh for goodness sake, get off this diatribe about "Woodland Park", which was nothing but unusable scrap property. And Mountain Park wasn't abandoned, quite the opposite, property became so desirable in that area that it (like the original Roanoke Country Club) was demolished to make room for highly desirable residental development. Mill Mountain needs work. There is nothing there but a substandard zoo, a tacky neon star and some seldom used trails. A inn, restaurant would be a great asset to the city, and I have no doubt that soooner or later, some development on the mountaintop WILL come to pass.